5 Winners

(1)  The Prohibition Party.  The nation’s oldest third party has opened up a state party in New York, and is gearing up to tear away at the Cuomo beer guzzling machine.  And with the warring Old Guard passed on, it’s gearing up to a rock em sock em three way presidential nomination contest for 2020.  Fun times ahead.

(2)  Zombie Dennis Hof.  One way to beat back scandal.  Die.  Then no one can speak ill of you, and you can cruise to election.  We’ll see if this strategy in crisis management takes off.

(3)  The Beto O’Rourke vice Presidential caravan.  I can’t tell if comments by various pols saying that O’Rourke’s senate bid loss benefits a possible presidential bid by not tying him to the Senate and Senate duties is a facetious commentary on modern politics or not.  As it were, I see comments that Beto’s loss is good for the Dems, because it removes a sure-fire loser from contention.  Funny that.  So.  Does this leave him veep timber?  Noted: Texas swung closer for the Dms than Ohio in 2016.

(4)  Rocky De La Fuente.  Ran in nine Senate races.  Winning anywhere between .3 percent of the vote and 12.3 percent of the vote.  If you’re committed to political office seeking as a hobby, might as well do it on this scale.

(5)  Communism.  Fascist forces are slinging it out with antifa on the streets of Portland, as bourgioise liberals are alayed in the cross winds.  The fascists swing their praises for old time authoritarian regimes — Pinochet and Franco.  The antifas have an honest to gosh Hammer and Sickle flag, showing that… yes… Communism is on the March!

5 Losers

(1)  The Natural Law Party.  Ceased operation nationally in 2004, but Party Boss Doug Dern hands out a ballot line in Michigan for the asking.  What do they stand for?  Is anyone advocating the square root of one percent of a population for a troubled area mediating for peace approach anymore?  Nay.  The party strays from its roots, and has only three candidates to show for itself.

(2)  The Modern Whig Party.  David Brooks, beleaguered Never Trumper Man without a Party, pines for the days of Zachary Taylor and Henry Clay and so spotted the “Modern Whig Party” a nod of approval in an August column.  The party failed to capitalize, running as many candidates for office as their nineteenth century historical inspiration did: zero.  We see what happens in a year and two years.

(3)  The Lyndon Larouche Movement.  They ran two candidates, the flagship being the most successful candidate of the Obama eara — Kesha Rogers — who acted the irritant to the Texas Democratic Party by winning two congressional nominations and forcing a run off for Senate nomination.  In 2018, the party got to ignore her completely.  Oddly, the lesser candidate, from the org’s perspective, did better in his rural climes — and against more overlapping competition that could dip into pro-Trump support.

(4)  Taylor Swift.  Her political neutrality makes for good business sense.  Want everyone to buy her music, right?  But the odd thing about endorsing Phil Bredesen — the Democratic candidate his Republican supporters had slyly called “The Best Republican Governor Tennessee ever had” — on progressive grounds is… it does clash against Bredesen’s political posiitioning.  On the plus side, she lost her weird “White Nationalist” supporters who had embraced her, deciding to read white pride into her lyrics off of her political non stances and a couple over sensitive politically correct criticisms… maybe they’re now having to go over to Kanye West?

(5)  Ann Coulter’s love affair with Kansas.  After Kansas elected a Democrat for governor, she tweeted “Kansas — you are dead to me.”  Poses some odd questions — Was Kansas ever really alive for Ann Coulter, and if so — why?

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