A few years ago, I thought that Britney Spears was basically doomed.  I pictured her slashing her wrist in half-hearted suicide attempts, demanding attention to stop her, if pressed I would say — only because my frames of references are decidedly minimal — in the corner of a cocaine-flowing party of the stars.
As it turned out, her collapse went more like this:

Britney Spears attempted suicide in rehab last week, according to The News of the World.
The paper claims Britney also wrote devil’s number, 666, on her shaved head and began screaming “I am the Antichrist!” at frightened clinic staff.  […]  The News of the World report claims Britney has also been speaking at length with ex-husband Kevin Federline, telling him she wants to get back together and have another baby.

Which is infinitely more bizarre than I had considered.  (Not that I gave it too much thought.)
All of this is schadenfruede to the public, and I guess I hope everyone is enjoying it.  But the reason her problems were pretty easy to see coming: she was trained to be an under-aged sex symbol — not good for her development — and so enconsed in a type of bubble-gum pop (written by a committee to float sexual innuendoes through the lyrics that amount to “Do Me.”) that she was not likely to be able to make the transition when it is necessary to expand her horizons.

What I am wondering about Britney Spears is this: imagine that she somehow gets into the right light and is semi-reasonable in following career advice and not going off that track.  What advice and trajectory could she be given to have a career of one sort or another?  If it were simply a matter of running through rehab, she would be fine — relatively, but the problem is if she… now has to address her problems in any comeback performance.  Go away for ten years and then try to crack a generation (more or less the ten years younger than I)’s nostalgia?  I once heard someone postulate that a singer or band can continue a successful touring career for the duration of their lives — successful in that they will be booked as large draws at county fairs and medium draws at larger arenas — if they have but two bonafide hits (which the paying public will know and be able to sing along with) — which with some minor songs and with a few covers and perhaps singing one or both twice in their set will allow them the desired time on stage.

I believe Britney Spears has, legitimately, 3 songs that anyone has really hummed to, and under that rubric could pull that off. If she wanted it. And if she could get her head on straight.

Beyond that, her 3 songs (give or take one or two) will be available for commercial use, tv and movie use, and radio play — which means she is set in terms of royalties… as any number of one-hit or popular for a time artists are/were.

… if she wants to screw her head back on.

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